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So I gave up. I do that sometimes. I was spending far too much time trying to impress people with shit I don't know about music. I couldn't keep it up.
But now I've got a more viable project. Hopefully I can learn a little about myself as I go:

Lyrics.

Who did I think I was, trying to be musical and funny and wise? I'm a writer. the most I can hope to be is funny. So poetry - rhymes - they are my solution.

I do this a lot, jot down snatches of lyrics in class, with some vague beat in my head. many of these songs or peices thereof already exist, and are written by real song writers. That's why I won't be taking credit for anything that gains the least bit of popularity around here.

Now, my first example. I'll try to do this everyday. Keep my mind nimble and all. No more boring introductions, thank gawd! If you were ever a student, you got sick of intros too.
I am a student, and this was a big hit in my writing/us history class. It's about our teacher, who is notorious for not allowing slackers like me on phones (I loot like I'm taking notes, ha ha, I'm rhyming).
You may recognize the song's structure. It's very, unreasonably, popular right now.


Jeff Gagnon style!... Gagnon style! [x2]

I'm droppin knowledge
from my new professorship in Marshall College
Lumumba-Zapata is what the students used to call it
But I'm not a Zappatista
I don't support the Communistas
I just like the girls who kinda feminista

Is Justice always fair?
Sometimes it is sometimes it's not, I've got gel in my hair
And I'll read to you a lot, and here's why you should care,
Don't wanna put you on the spot or cause a new red scare,
But who put that fence and boxes there?

so pay attention, see intersection
expand your brains (hey!)
understand Keynes (hey!)
the social safety net, don't go on facebook yet,
expand your brains (hey!)
understand Keynes (hey!)
And you'll respect the lady tritons in my
claaaa-aaaaa-aaa-aaa-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-ass!

[pause]

This is Gagnon style!
Jeff! Jeff, jeff jeffjeff, Jeff Gagnon style
Gagnon style!
Jeff! Jeff, jeff jeffjeff, Jeff Gagnon style
Heeeeeeey, no sexting, lady!
Jeff! Jeff, jeff jeffjeff, Jeff Gagnon style
Heeeeeeey, no sexting, lady!
Jeff jeff jeff jeff
Hey-ey-ey-ey-ey-ey

My crew is motley
We'll teach you Gagnon style
I've got chronic style, anti-hegemonic style
I'm not a commie
but it's not Mitt Romney's style
I've got chronic style, anti-hegemonic style

so come to class, yo
don't be an asshole
anti-hegemony (hey!)
know, check, and be (hey!)
Not time to shop, fool, dont make me DOC you
turn off your phone (hey!)
leave it at home (hey!)
And you'll respect the lady tritons in my
claaaa-aaaaa-aaa-aaa-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-ass!

[pause]

This is Gagnon style!
Jeff! Jeff, jeff jeffjeff, Jeff Gagnon style
Gagnon style!
Jeff! Jeff, jeff jeffjeff, Jeff Gagnon style
Heeeeeeey, no sexting, lady!
Jeff! Jeff, jeff jeffjeff, Jeff Gagnon style
Heeeeeeey, no sexting, lady!
Jeff jeff jeff jeff
Hey-ey-ey-ey-ey-ey

[crapper scene]
Not radical, leftist but soft-core
Like Mariscal, my style of teaching is not the norm
'cuz I do not conform
'cuz the master narrative is boring
My family's Irish-born and my name is Jeff Gagnon
you heard what I say?

Gagnon style!
Jeff! Jeff, jeff jeffjeff, Jeff Gagnon style
Heeeeeeey, no sexting, lady!
Jeff! Jeff, jeff jeffjeff, Jeff Gagnon style
Heeeeeeey, no sexting, lady!
Jeff jeff jeff jeff
Hey-ey-ey-ey-ey-ey

[pause]

Gagnon style!

(...and Gagnon was his name-o)

Nowa wordform Jay-Z (so sick)