041513

Practice Looking Hard - Existentialist Version

Remember that it's just a bunch of pixels in a picture, not a bong
It's just the same way with statistics, and our mandatory minimum laws
I can call the politicians motives fake, call that a rolled up snake and not a cinnamon roll

I keep a mirror in my pocket and I practice looking hard
Mirror, mirror, call the shot, what is real, what is not?
I keep a mirror in my pocket and I practice looking hard
Each morn before I leave the house I make sure that I look around

Whatever happened to the days of fidelity?
When did consumerist hegemony become our reality?
Everybody's got a story to tell
like the Bible, which says we sinners go to hell
I guess we're living in the last days
cuz in the last days, people avert their gaze,
turn away from plagues, brothers killing brothers,
and they don't see the hell we built for one another
It seems we all could use some constructive criticism
instead of this destructive neoliberalism
What is your brand of representation?
the lens through which you view your nation?
Ask yourself if it's yours or some other white man's creation
Don't be so sure of your significance
disregard the chances, refuse to take a second glance
I'll tell you why, they eyes can lie
Seek first to understand before you speak, you'd be surprised
how often corporate propaganda can deceive,
what kinda message you yourself are trying to receive
You better look what's underneath
I can't help it cuz what's mine they done took, I want it back
This is my mad-at-the-world rap

I keep a mirror in my pocket and I practice looking hard
Mirror, mirror, call the shot, what is real, what is not?
I keep a mirror in my pocket and I practice looking hard
Each morn before I leave the house I make sure that I look around


[this definitely is not finished]

041413

Tits and Tats
[something like boots and boys by Ke$ha. If men can be objectified, so can women... I know, this is a controversial, revolutionary concept]

It's just something about
tits and tats (tits and tats)
Hey man what's up with that? (I gotta say it)
I think they're both so cool, make me act a fool
tits and tats (tits and tats)

I might have to glance when a hottie slink past
but when I see those tats, it makes my neck snapback
and tatoos, andthe way they move,
they make me wanna tap that but I might have a heart attack

Fine ink fine rack but she looks badass
killer like the matrix, say bye-bye to Kansas
when she shake , makes me foam at the mouth like fantas
Yeah, her art is fine, but I love the canvas

It's just something about
tits and tats (tits and tats)
Hey man what's up with that? (I gotta say it)
I think they're both so cool, make me act a fool
tits and tats (tits and tats)

No hotter thing I know than when they peek through her clothes
I see a snake curled up in her pantyhose
On the back of her neck is that a rose?
makes me wanna lean in, makes me wanna look closer
one splash of paint and you can have my heart
But I know you got thorns on your softest parts

Hey girl, wanna see my ink, lemme know what you think
Cuz I see you rocking them angel wings
they're a fine pair too, bling in between
like you stalk the halls like you femme fatale
like something Banksy scrawled on your temple walls
you make my head stand tall, wanna grab my balls
Cuz you're without flaw,
Cuz your flesh so fresh and your tat so raw
Shock and awe, girl, shock and awe

If I see a bit, be sure, I'm gonna beg for more
insect on your neck, girl, you the bomb
I sweat, I'm erect, feel like a peeping tom
paradise on your chest like the isle of Guam
the way those palm trees sway make me wanna face palm

It's just something about
tits and tats (tits and tats)
Hey man what's up with that? (I gotta say it)
I think they're both so cool, make me act a fool
Just gimme tits and tats (tits and tats)

when leanin like a chola
make me wanna say hola
aunquesevidentella kick ass sola
Once you see that sight, man, you're marked for life

041313

way too late, air raid sirens wail
spent shells fallin like hot hail
steel rippin through your chainmail
I'll take you straight to the cross, drive in the last nail
without fail
A silent psycho with your life in her sights, she under death's veil

Leave your bitch ass holy, full of a hundred holes
my clip hold the fate of a hundred souls
every round full of hate for the faith you sold
I'm from the pits of hell, and now my place is yours
One-woman slaughterhouse
spraying out a hundred rounds
better pray I split your crown
better play dead when you hit the ground
cuz I finsh a dog of god when he's down

No soy angel, puto ni soy prostituta
Oye las gritas del los malditos, los disfruto

I'm on a mission from hellfire
hate speech preaching to the choir
praise no angel, cuz god's hate is for hire
the liberation of my people my only desire

Bells ringing, choirs singing, my bloody blade be swinging
perverted servants of eugenic churches getting nervous,
trying to find purchase, they clinging
while I'm rising
up to damn the dead, coming for the devils head
soy vengador with morals of a Babylonian whore
war's what I'm bringing

041213

I was pretty grotty to day.What follows is the truth. I need to explain what happened with the girl though. Someday I'll find the right rhymes...

Lemme tell ya:

Nasty

[to the beat of Ratchet Girl Anthem]

What follows is the truth.

Outa bed, lazy ass

get to class, crazy fast

sun high as fuck half the day's passed

sweet sleep can't last and I woke up nasty

oh em gee, wut do he hav on? (he nasty!)

his hungova ass shoulda stayed ahome (because he nasty)

gimme yaphone, ima take this critter picture (he nasty!)

got it, it's going on my twitter (oh, he so nasty)

he looks grungy he looks groggy like he's stoned (he nasty!)

why he in rags if he's rich, he ain't po (and he still nasty)

I jus wanna throa towel at his face (because he nasty)

such an eye-sore, outta-place disgrace (he nasty)

True, same old pants as yesterday

same jeans same briefs as yesterday

had a few wet dreams since yesterday

so  I might not smell my best today

But I'm not gonna stress bout mess today

I got no girl to impress today

Altoid mint, brush and spit, no clean t-shirt, shit, I'll be okay

And I ain't showered like I oughta

Styled my hair with water

look like I crawled outta cupboard like a muggle Harry Potter

Ain't had time to roll deo this morn'

fresh b.o., that's my cologne

Don't give a fuck what you think, I'm grown

So I'll stink link the mink in that Macklemore song

Opposite of mister Clean, rinse my mouth with listerine

sweet caffine, my gasoline, straight black no cream

toss it down lookin mean like that college kid meme

oh em gee, wut do he hav on? (he nasty!)

his hungova ass shoulda stayed at home (because he nasty)

gimme yaphone, ima take this critter picture (he nasty!)

got it, it's going on my twitter (oh, he so nasty)

he looks grungy he looks groggy like he's stoned (he nasty!)

why he in rags if he's rich, he ain't po (he still nasty)

I jus wanna throa towel at his face (because he nasty)

such an eye-sore, outta-place disgrace (he nasty)

In the corner of my class want an empty seat

to my left cuz I don't smell sweet

You might catch a whiff: maybe sweat or skeet

But here comes that girl again, oh sheeeeet

She rock the hottest body in chemistry

She gotta keep walkin, no, she's next to me

Why oh why'd she sit next to me

Can't let her looks or mine get the best of me

And so, I sigh,

At least she's wearing them yoga pants,

She prolly partied last night, with her friends, at a dance

And here there's still no chance for romance,

I still look like trash, wish she'd just walked past

so I could watch that ass from behind dark glasses

041113

A little ditty I'm working on instead of working. Meant to be spit rapid fire.

Hih hop it's go time
tick tock, clock's chimin
and I'm in
tip top condition
splittin hairs with precision with each critical hit I'm spittin from a sittin position
it's simple but vicious
released inhibitions
it burns and it itches like popped pimple emmissions (ewww)
that's just what I do
I smile like a child
dimples like it's christmas
having visions of business
want a tongue nimble enough to enrich this a ton or just havin fun
play with it long, string it along stackein paper like a don but it's college-ruled and it's torn
head full of heart song pants with a hard on
too damn strong to be wrong when you done caught on I'm long gone
As yet no set to rep, what I get it's from vets I've never met,
like E-40, but like concrete tryna set
no fly shorty, no g, pr or jet,
need a quarty, lost a dime in my last bet,
they say time is a teacher, then I'm its favorite little pet.

Phew. Gotta add to this later.

041113

Rafia Zakaria and Medea Benjamin just spoke at UCSD on Tuesday, following 4 days of protest in front of a local company that produces the CIA's most infamous new toy of destruction. What they said was illuminating - and inspiring.

This is what I wrote.

Modern Warfare

Modern warfare, outta sight outta mind
See no evil speak no evil, mainstream media's blind
So we hear no evil, we left our souls with our soldiers behind
A new way to reap a profit, new human meat to grind

The sya we fight for human rights, and I say they're all liars
rushin Alaskan pipelines to pour fossil fuel on the fires
expanding the empire with your politicians for hire gotta stand  back and admire
the beauty the brutality the truth without factaulity in our perverted version of reality
a dead Colorado teen's another enemy causuality
Because one's a  child soldier, two's a drug deal
three's a drone strike target tryna institute sharia
don't give a shit if their target's sunni or shia
an aid worker, a doctor, or an elementary school teacher
because no other country has rights the US must respect
fuck the law, fuck the press we got borders to protect
we got more bombs to drop with an xbox kinect
FAA in the pockets of the military industrial complex
ALEC having tea parties with congressional group sex
who knows who they're gonna screw next, could be you next
The president's okayed it, congress is overrated
war lobby negotiated CIA manipulated
we import Air Jordan and export our own cargo
the side of the box reads "War Crimes Incorporated"

Modern warfare, outta sight outta mind
See no evil speak no evil, mainstream media's blind
So we hear no evil, we left our souls with our soldiers behind
A new way to reap a profit, new human meat to grind

[I also tweaked Put Your Records On to the same theme. Why? your guess is as good as mine... Maybe I'll finish this later:]

Little metal bird buzzes the village
Obama told me we don't need to worry
Fire came down like the rain
so clean
Little boys blown to bits with the concrete
They saaaay that sometimes
They might get it wrong, but it's all right
It's the safest way, turn and look away, we don't hesitate
[chorus]
Worldwide we send our drones, we think we're safe it home
We just pretend it's our air now
Hellfire, reapers reap, your freedom don't come cheap
We go ahead it's our air now
We'll beat the terrorists someday, somehow
We'll be the terrorists, we are, for now

040013

So I gave up. I do that sometimes. I was spending far too much time trying to impress people with shit I don't know about music. I couldn't keep it up.
But now I've got a more viable project. Hopefully I can learn a little about myself as I go:

Lyrics.

Who did I think I was, trying to be musical and funny and wise? I'm a writer. the most I can hope to be is funny. So poetry - rhymes - they are my solution.

I do this a lot, jot down snatches of lyrics in class, with some vague beat in my head. many of these songs or peices thereof already exist, and are written by real song writers. That's why I won't be taking credit for anything that gains the least bit of popularity around here.

Now, my first example. I'll try to do this everyday. Keep my mind nimble and all. No more boring introductions, thank gawd! If you were ever a student, you got sick of intros too.
I am a student, and this was a big hit in my writing/us history class. It's about our teacher, who is notorious for not allowing slackers like me on phones (I loot like I'm taking notes, ha ha, I'm rhyming).
You may recognize the song's structure. It's very, unreasonably, popular right now.


Jeff Gagnon style!... Gagnon style! [x2]

I'm droppin knowledge
from my new professorship in Marshall College
Lumumba-Zapata is what the students used to call it
But I'm not a Zappatista
I don't support the Communistas
I just like the girls who kinda feminista

Is Justice always fair?
Sometimes it is sometimes it's not, I've got gel in my hair
And I'll read to you a lot, and here's why you should care,
Don't wanna put you on the spot or cause a new red scare,
But who put that fence and boxes there?

so pay attention, see intersection
expand your brains (hey!)
understand Keynes (hey!)
the social safety net, don't go on facebook yet,
expand your brains (hey!)
understand Keynes (hey!)
And you'll respect the lady tritons in my
claaaa-aaaaa-aaa-aaa-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-ass!

[pause]

This is Gagnon style!
Jeff! Jeff, jeff jeffjeff, Jeff Gagnon style
Gagnon style!
Jeff! Jeff, jeff jeffjeff, Jeff Gagnon style
Heeeeeeey, no sexting, lady!
Jeff! Jeff, jeff jeffjeff, Jeff Gagnon style
Heeeeeeey, no sexting, lady!
Jeff jeff jeff jeff
Hey-ey-ey-ey-ey-ey

My crew is motley
We'll teach you Gagnon style
I've got chronic style, anti-hegemonic style
I'm not a commie
but it's not Mitt Romney's style
I've got chronic style, anti-hegemonic style

so come to class, yo
don't be an asshole
anti-hegemony (hey!)
know, check, and be (hey!)
Not time to shop, fool, dont make me DOC you
turn off your phone (hey!)
leave it at home (hey!)
And you'll respect the lady tritons in my
claaaa-aaaaa-aaa-aaa-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-ass!

[pause]

This is Gagnon style!
Jeff! Jeff, jeff jeffjeff, Jeff Gagnon style
Gagnon style!
Jeff! Jeff, jeff jeffjeff, Jeff Gagnon style
Heeeeeeey, no sexting, lady!
Jeff! Jeff, jeff jeffjeff, Jeff Gagnon style
Heeeeeeey, no sexting, lady!
Jeff jeff jeff jeff
Hey-ey-ey-ey-ey-ey

[crapper scene]
Not radical, leftist but soft-core
Like Mariscal, my style of teaching is not the norm
'cuz I do not conform
'cuz the master narrative is boring
My family's Irish-born and my name is Jeff Gagnon
you heard what I say?

Gagnon style!
Jeff! Jeff, jeff jeffjeff, Jeff Gagnon style
Heeeeeeey, no sexting, lady!
Jeff! Jeff, jeff jeffjeff, Jeff Gagnon style
Heeeeeeey, no sexting, lady!
Jeff jeff jeff jeff
Hey-ey-ey-ey-ey-ey

[pause]

Gagnon style!

(...and Gagnon was his name-o)

Nowa wordform Jay-Z (so sick)